Me & My Boys: Always the artist, never the subject. Until now.

The other day I read a heartbreaking story. A little 2.5 year old boy and his father went out for a canoe ride on the lake where they lived. It was the mother's birthday and the dad thought it would be nice for her to have some quiet time. The canoe capsized about both the little boy and the dad drowned. I am sure he died trying to save his little boy, knowing he wouldn't save himself without his young son.

Just thinking about that mother, who was at home, sitting on the couch, reading a book, not knowing that just outside her window her husband and sweet child were struggling for their last breaths. The despair she must have felt when they told her they recovered her 33 month old son's body from the lake. Hoping beyond hope that they had swam to shore and were lost somewhere, then realizing the worst had happened. I can not fathom the physical pain and heartache that kind of loss would cause.

I imagine I would be trying to scrape together all the little moments-turned-memories that made up your last days and weeks together. What you did the night before, the last time you tucked him into bed, seeing him smiling in his crib when you get him up from his nap, the way he said little things, the look on his face when he was hurt and wanted to be held, the sweet kisses and hugs. Trying to get it all down before it faded away. And the pictures. Oh the pictures.

I am so thankful to have two healthy boys, and I am so thankful for each and every day with them. Every single day. Even as they are growing, I love to look at their earlier pictures and remember them in those moments. Those fleeting moments.

One thing is always lacking in their photos. I see them in their pictures and I feel the love I have for these precious boys. But I have very few pictures of me with either boy. And even fewer that capture a special moment between mother and son. So after shedding some tears for that poor woman who lost her family and holding my babies close, I decided to spend an afternoon trying to capture some of those moments.

With big brother. Who enjoyed pushing the shutter button, starting the self-timer, and then running back to me each time. Such a smarty.